Take a peek inside my Tinder profile!
My current Tinder bio reads:
I love animals, food BDSM and travel.
You'll find conversations with me "refreshing" because I'm funny, genuine and straight forward.
You'll be surprised to learn that I HATE hiking and don't want kids.
Height doesn't matter to me because I'm more interested in if you're a good human.
I love singing, dancing, laughing and am an outgoing introvert that enjoys being the big spoon.
I'm not looking for compliments or validation. Simply starting a conversation with "hello" is great!
Let's dive into this bio a little more in depth.
Yes, I enjoy BDSM! NO, random tinder man, this does not mean I want you to tie me up. People usually include hobbies and interests in their Tinder bios, this just happens to be one of mine. It's always interesting to see if people use this as a prompt to try and impress me, connect with me over a common interest or just make gross unwanted sexual advances.
I should not have to minimize my personality or refrain from telling men about my passions or interests just to avoid being harassed.
It's just not my thing.
I'm not very outdoorsy but sometimes I will have drinks on a patio.
Don't try and change my mind on this one! Did you know it is ok for partners to have their own individual hobbies and interests!?
I don't want kids
Because it's not something I desire to do. I have a niece and nephew and I am very happy and fulfilled being "Titi."
I am 5'2 so nearly everyone is taller than me. Whenever people put their height and weight in their bio it leaves me wondering what their reach and record is like its the UFC or something.
Yes, being the big spoon is great! I enjoy it for reasons such as:
You will not snore in my ear.
You will not get a face full of my hair.
I will not wake you up when I get up to pee.
You will not sweat all over me.
I can do the reach around and grab your dick.
I enjoy rubbing your back and running my fingers through your hair until you fall asleep.
When I want to go to bed I can roll over and sleep however I like.
Starting the conversation with "Hello!"
We are on a dating app where you look at people's photos and swipe right or left based on if you think the person is attractive or not. I know I'm good looking, and you probably think I'm good looking too because why else would you have swiped right on me?
Compliments don't usually flatter me because at the end of the day I am comfortable and happy with the woman I am and it doesn't make a difference to me if you think I'm sexy or not.
Just talk to me like you would if you saw me in public.
What type of BDSM do you like? I'm a submissive masochist that enjoys degradation.
What do you like to do in your spare time?
Relax, go for massages and pedicures, masturbate, go to dinner and movies, travel, spend time with family, make memes, netflix, listen to podcasts and learn about sex, communication and psychology and go to the casino.
How's the pandemic treating you?
Shitty. I wasn't working from March - August and it's been really hard dealing with depression/anxiety. I am following the restrictions and protocols which sucks but I still live with my parents so I'm happy I get to see them.
What do you do for work?
I will tell you and also mention that I am a certified sex educator and life coach. This is usually where guys make or break the conversation with me, assuming they haven't already done so by making comments about my appearance, interest in BDSM or comment about masturbating. So yes, I am a sex educator and No, I do not want to give you a "sex ed lesson."
Want to come over for a drink?
Not even on a good day, let alone during a pandemic. After exchanging video messages or facetiming with someone, I usually like to grab a coffee with them and see how we vibe in person without alcohol! I'm a huge lightweight and can't drive after having a drink and would rather have dessert than a drink.
What are you looking for on here?
This answer is always copy and pasted from a note in my phone I have called "Tinder responses" because I've been asked this question SO many times.
It says: "Basically I use to be really set on finding a boyfriend but having those expectations were very limiting and now I'm really just open to experiences. Whatever comes my way. A friendship, maybe it's 1 or 2 great nights with someone, maybe from those friendships come a partnership.
If it was a partnership I would like a supportive partner, a best friend to travel with, someone thats outgoing and not a big partier or into hard drugs, someone who can be an adult but also be silly like a kid, ( and also doesn't want to have kids) loves sex as much as I do and knows how to communicate. They need to have a license, a vehicles and be comfortable with who they are as a person but not let that stop them from evolving and growing."
Yes, I'm sex positive! And YES, I am positive I DON'T want to have sex with you!
I've found that above everything, I am looking to be respected.
Navigating an app like Tinder as a sex positive female has been hard and trying at times.
How do I communicate my interests to these strangers without them getting the wrong idea?
How do I be assertive and friendly while communicating via text with someone I've never met?
How do I get people to take me seriously when I tell them I'm not looking for hookups even though I am open about my sexuality? I've found the approach that works the best for me is to be myself and see how people react. I will show them who I am, and they will show me who they are. If I like what the person is showing me I can pursue them, if I don't, I unmatch. If you're thinking that I'm "asking" to be harassed because I openly talk about my interests with people so that they can get to know me, you're wrong. That's and old outdated way of thinking. Like when people would say"she was asking to be sexually assaulted because of what she wore." Unless a woman specifically asks you to do something, she is not asking for it.